Top 15 "Mommy Warning" Sayings

Someone gave my 5-year-old a recorder for Christmas. It may not be the worst Christmas gift (for me) that my kids have ever received - that honor goes to the fire truck that blared (no joke) "I love spraying with my hose!" at 100 decibels, but it's close. It might be different if he could PLAY the recorder, but as of now all his does is blow as hard as possible, making a noise like a tornado siren with a cat stuck in it. So after a long day of being warned not to "play" the recorder in the house, I finally snapped at my son, "Mister, you are cruisin' for a bruisin'!" He just blinked and then asked, "What awe you even tawking about?!" And I had no good answer for that. We certainly don't beat our kids. All I can say is that my parents (who also did not beat their kids) said it all the time when I was growing up. This made me wonder what other weird "warning" phrases other moms use. ParentDish came up with one list, but I think we can make one way funnier! From Facebook:

"'There's going to be big trouble in River City.' I still don't get it." - Mandi

"Wait 'til your father gets home!" - Carrie

"Do you WANT to be in trouble today? No? Then KNOCK.IT.OFF!" -Jeni

"I'm going to let the zombies eat your brains tonight" - Tom

"Don't make me count to three!" - Marie

"My dad used to say, 'Your a** is grass and "A family friend used to tell us, 'I'm going to rip off your arms and beat you with the bloody stumps.' I think he was kidding?" - Bekky

"My dad used to say 'Your twin sister, we had; YOU we adopted.'" - Kymberly

‎"Get ta steppin!!" - Carrie

"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out!" - April (channeling Bill Cosby)

"I don't care if it's fun, it needs to be done." - Beth (channeling Dr. Seuss)

"Want in one hand and poop in the other, and see which fills up faster." - Kevin

"Yours is not to question why, yours is but to do or die," - Jenny

"I'm going to sell you to the Gypsies!" - Jill


What's your go-to mommy warning?

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