Madonna in a Thong, Jane Fonda in a Jumpsuit…What Exactly is Age-Appropriate Dressing?


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There was a moment on the Grammys red carpet when Madonna, wearing a Givenchy outfit that was, short, tight, exposed beaucoup cleavage, and involved fishnets and perilously high heels, flashed off her rear on the red carpet, revealing a kind of thong-bra for her butt. Reactions to the 56-year-old’s effort to stay edgy were visceral, to say the least. “I can’t tell if Madonna is resting on her laurels, or if someone told her Fifty Shades of Grey is AARP erotica and she’s trying to ride the trend,” wrote the Fug Girls. And fan of hers commented on Instagram, “We get it Madonna. You’re decent looking for your age, blah blah blah. I think it’s time for the classy Madonna to come out.”

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Magazines like to trumpet the news that you can look hot at any age, with examples of actresses who routinely show plenty of skin and somehow manage to look way hotter than they did at 25: Sofia Vergara, Cameron Diaz, Jennifer Lopez, and Jennifer Aniston, whose leg-bearing Golden Globes dress caused one person to Tweet, “What awards will Jennifer Aniston’s legs be winning this evening?” But if 40 is the new 30 (or 20?), then what is 56 supposed to look like?

Some compared Madonna to Annie Lennox, 60, who also performed that night. Lennox opted for understated, with a sequin black blazer and pants. “There’s a certain gloriousness to Lennox seemingly accepting herself and meeting herself at her own age,” wrote Keo Nozari on the Huffington Post. But is it really about age, or personal style? Taylor Swift, who is 25, went for a floor length gown, modest as per usual.

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“Self-expression is not only for the young,” Myf Warhurst reminded us in the Guardian. If we can agree that there are no hard and fast rules to dressing your age, then do we just favor certain personalities over others? Why, for example, is 59-year-old Kris Jenner, a grandmother four times over, chided (“What does the Kardashian family have against appropriate bottoms?” was one Tweet) for rocking sheer pants to the Chanel show while Jane Fonda, 77, can show up on the Grammys red carpet, hand posed on hip, in a tight green Balmain jumpsuit that looked like something that would have suited Prince equally well, and commentators practically give her a standing ovation? “When Jane Fonda puts her hand on her hip, emergency rooms call in every nurse they have on staff, because they know they’re going to have to treat thousands of people who suffered a concussion after fainting from being exposed to her hotness,” wrote D Listed.

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If we’re going to consider the male opinion, they seem by and large comfortable with women trying to look a bit young. Last summer in Esquire, Tom Junod wrote a piece in praise of the sexiness of women in their forties. “Let’s face it: There used to be something tragic about even the most beautiful forty-two-year-old woman,” he writes. But on the contrary, “it may be said that the best thing that forty-two-year-old American men have going for them is forty-two-year-old American women.” There was a backlash to the article, for the very idea that a man needed to inform us that the most beautiful 40-something women in the world aren’t past their prime.

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It’s not about Madonna’s bottom versus Annie Lennox’s blazer or Kris Jenner’s pants versus Jane Fonda’s hips, but more a question of vulgarity, not of fashion. It’s how hard one seems to be trying to subtract decades from their age and which trends they’ll blindly coopt in order to stay relevant. We want to think that in our 40s, 50s, 60s, and way beyond that we’ll have an innate confidence in our style—and in who we really are—that makes quasi-bondage gear irrelevant. “Madonna — either the person OR the corporation — does not need to prove anything to anyone at this point in her life. She’s done it all. She’s a legend for life,” wrote the Fug Girls. “NOBODY is going to judge her if she wants to shelve the rump sling.”

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