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When Grandpa and Grandma Are Mommy and Daddy


I had always heard in my younger years that nothing would ever totally dominate my emotions as much as the moment I held my first grandchild in my arms. And, as most younger people who are trying to juggle jobs, meals, housekeeping, and small children, that comment seemed at the time to be the foolish pratter of the dementia that surely must be brewing in those older minds. My husband and I were learning everyday that there was "new stuff" to learn and to handle everyday; and, every new age seemed to come with a totally new set of behaviors and the learning had to start all over again! There was no way, or so it seemed, that these infants-toddlers-tots would ever be able to reach an age at which they would present us with babies. Surely centuries would pass before that happened, and we would be free to enjoy years of wonderful "life after work".

Well, we found out that "they" weren't the demented ones--we were. Children grow so fast. One minute you're throwing the football at your son and dancing around the kitchen with your daughter, and the next minute you're throwing birdseed or confetti at a laughing young couple, or slowly dancing with a beautiful young bride in a reception hall somewhere. It is over just that quickly. But no! Before the wedding bills are fully paid, or you and Dad have put the deposit down on the cruise you've always wanted to take, the children come home with the news they know you want to hear---we're going to have a baby. At first you're taken in by the grins and bubbly atmosphere surrounding you, and then reality sets in. In our case reality really set in because we had not done the whole wedding thing first. We became a part of one of those statistics the media is always throwing around--single girls having babies.

You know what??? In the end it doesn't really matter, does it? I'm a woman of faith, and I always wanted things to be done "by the Good Book", but life doesn't always go along with that, and when that baby boy entered my life many months later, one look at the messy little cluncker (10 lbs!) and I was in love forever. In that moment the whys and wherefores faded into insignificance, because there were our features, this one's nose, and that one's eyes...features that cried out "I am part of this family". And our hearts melted.

We now have two little ones--our grandboy and our little grandgirl who came along two years ago. We all live together, and if titles get a little mixed right now it's all right. Mommy who is Mommy, and Mommy who is Grandma know their part in baby girl's life, and although Daddy is Grandpa now, she will know Grandpa soon enough. Her "Bubby" who is nine already, has figured it out, and he knows he is in a secure and loving place. There are so many of us in society today...we who were reared in the basic family units of the past, and yet find ourselves in whole new settings in the world as it is today. But guess what--love is love in any age and in any era. Christ said to "suffer the little children to come unto me". When I'm in a tired or grouchy mood, I just "suffer little children", but I know what He meant. We need to embrace the children, and if and when we can, help them to find their places in this world of today. And we need to teach them to love their neighbors as themselves, and have good old-fashioned manners and courtesy for others. And if Mommy and Daddy can't do this, or they aren't there to do it, then Grandma and Grandpa need to step into their roles to do it for them. Only then, with strong family influences and God's help, can our little ones maybe find the civility of life in days gone by.

Blessings.