Best and Worst Celebrity Baby Names of 2011
In countries such as New Zealand or Sweden there are outright bans on certain names, which means creative parents never get the chance to saddle Junior with a moniker like "Lucifer," "Superman," or the rather tricky to pronounce name, "Brfxxccxxmnpcccclll- mmnprxvclmnckssqlbb11116." But in this country, we have no such laws, which means people (and by people, I really mean rock stars, models, pro athletes, and reality TV performers) are free to choose whatever kind of shocking/silly names they fancy. In the past few years, celebrities have exercised this right at full tilt--as a result, the baby names some stars came up with bordered on the absurd (I'm thinking of infamous bad choices like Apple, Kal-el, or Rob Morrow's daughter Tu Morrow--yes, that's real).
These famous folks might do well to follow the advice of an instructional guide we found called "How to Name Your Baby Without Handicapping It for Life," published in 1922 by a world-class curmudgeon who happened to be named Alexander McQueen. In it, McQueen admonished, "Give your children names indicative of what you would have them be--in this world and in the world to come--and at the same time bear in mind the practical, everyday value of a well-chosen name." To this end, he offered parents "The Seven Rules of Naming":
1. The name should be worthy. 2. It should have a good meaning. 3. It should be original. 4. It should be easy to pronounce. 5. It should be distinctive. 6. It should fit the family name. 7. It should indicate the sex.
In 2011, there were some celebrity parents who did manage, in McQueen's style, to come up with inspired and tasteful names for their little ones, though some very much did not. Here's our roundup.
Best celeb baby names 2011
Girls
Amaya (Mariska Haritgay)
Joni (Zac Brown of the Zac Brown Band)
Monroe (Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon)
Penelope Athena (Tina Fey)
Willow Sage (Pink)
Boys
Milo (Alyssa Milano)
Skyler (Rachel Zoe)
Marcelo (Ali Landry)
Flynn (Miranda Kerr and Orlando Bloom)
Weston (Jenna Fischer)
Worst celeb baby names, 2011 edition:
Girls
Mosely (Peyton Manning)
Mirabella Bunny (Bryan Adams)
Genesis (Viola Davis)
Arlo (Johnny Knoxville)
Indiana (Ethan Hawke)
Boys
Kroy Jagger (Real Housewives of Atlanta's Kim Zolciak)
Spike (Mike Myers)
Bear Blu (Alicia Silverstone)
Kannon (Kevin James)
Diesel (Jennie Finch)
Moroccan Scott (Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon)
In 2012, I suspect Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck (parents of Violet and Seraphina) will give their new baby boy a name fit for the "best of" list, and here's hoping that Beyonce and Jay-Z and Jessica Simpson get their hands on a copy of "How to Name Your Baby Without Handicapping It for Life."
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