How to Keep Your Kids Close to Faraway Family
How to Keep Your Kids Close to Faraway Family
You live on Vancouver Island. Your parents live in Montreal. Your sister lives in Newfoundland. And your in-laws live in London! Does that mean your kiddo can't be close to all of them? Pshaw! These fun bonding ideas will keep your kids close to your family's hearts, and vice-versa.
Tell Tall Tales
Make up bedtime (or anytime) stories that involve relatives. If your little girl likes princesses, name a princess after Aunt Robin. If she likes knights, tell her a story of how Papa once slayed a dragon. Even subtle reminders of family members can strengthen the connection between them, says Janie McQueen, author of Family Fusion: Bonding, Sharing, and Learning in a Hostile World. "Real stories about the person are great, too. They can be just as entertaining!" So go ahead and tell your kid about that time your dad mistook a raccoon in the backyard for a bear.
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Make A Photo Album For Your Baby
Make A Photo Album For Your Baby
Create a photo album just for your baby (a soft or cloth-covered one is best) with pictures of all the special people in her life, near and far. Let it be the book you "read" to her every night so that even if she only sees Nana in person a few times a year, she'll recognize her face and know that she's someone special who loves her. Display photos around the house too, so that your loved ones faces are a regular part of daily life.
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Capture the Everyday
Capture the Everyday
Shoot everyday happenins, not just the big milestones. Start a family YouTube channel where you can upload short daily videos of your baby eating peas, your toddler playing with his trucks, or your big kid talking about his day at school. It's the everyday stuff that encourages intimacy, says McQueen.
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Scan Your Kids' Artwork
Scan Your Kids' Artwork
Scan or photograph your children's drawings and paintings and send them to the grandparents, suggests Patricia Babuka, Founder of GrandCamp Adventures, which publishes storybooks made specifically for grandparents and grandkids. That way, Grammy and Paps can "ooh" and "ahh" over the masterpieces while talking to your kids on the phone-and your kids can bask in their pride.
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Make Story Time a Family Affair
Make Story Time a Family Affair
For your child's next birthday, ask relatives to record themselves reading an interactive storybook (look for some at Chapters Indigo or Hallmark stores across Canada). That way, Cousin Ben or Pap-Pap can put your child to bed, even long-distance!
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Keep Track Of Cheap Flights
Keep Track Of Cheap Flights
Sign up on Kayak to be notified about if/when flights to wherever your family lives dip below a price that you designate. When it does, book it! Even it means missing school, a few (affordable) days with loved ones is worth it.
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Plan an Annual Get-Together
Plan an Annual Get-Together
f Disney's not in the cards anytime soon, plan a more low-key family vacation that you can do every year. Take a weekend camping trip; spend day or two at an amusement park near you; rent a cabin near a lake; or host a weekend of "Family Olympics" at your home every summer (with basketball shooting competitions, water balloon tosses, tug of war, and trivia games).
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Video Chat
Video Chat
Whether you use Skype or iChat, replace some of your regular phone calls with video ones. Live chats like this can go a long way in making your kid feel like Aunt Karen is just in the other room, not the other state, says Babuka. "Schedule a weekly time to do it, so that you're not trying to grab the kids from what they're doing at the last minute, when they probably won't want to talk," she says.
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Keep Complaints to Yourself
Keep Complaints to Yourself
Try not to talk badly about your annoying relatives in front of the kids. If there's one way to sour your child's relationship with family members she doesn't see often, this is it, says McQueen. Even if she doesn't understand what you mean when you complain, "He's so passive-aggressive!" she'll understand your tone.
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Play the
Play the "Who Loves You?" Game
In the car, before bed, or during other quiet moments, ask your child to name all of the people who love them. He'll likely start with his parents and siblings, but then encourage him to think of his more distant relatives. Say, "Auntie Beth loves you, too!" and "Cousin Evan loves you sooo much!"
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Get Cooking
Get Cooking
Prepare family foods together. If you don't already know a few family recipes -- whether they're for matzoh balls or kheer rice pudding -- learn them now. Food is an enjoyable, comforting way to pass on family traditions. Cook the food with your child, letting him help as much as you can, and talk about the history: "Grandma made this dish for me every Sunday and I always loved it."
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Ask Granny To Babysit
Ask Granny To Babysit
Instead of spending money on a babysitter for a week, why not use the money to buy a plane ticket to fly in a relative who's game for childcare? Spending time with your kids (without you around) is a fantastic way for relatives to bond with them. And your little ones will love the novelty of a new caregiver, and will probably be on their best behaviour to boot!
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Send Snail Mail
Send Snail Mail
Even though kids are used to instant communication gratification, they're still super excited to get mail that has their name on it! And what grandparent doesn't love opening up a drawing or letter that she can hang on the fridge? Major bonding points for care packages!
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