How to Have Super Hot (but Super Lazy) Sex
We know you’ve got moves in the bedroom…the problem is, they require energy. Whether you’re sleep-deprived or just plain feeling lazy, there are days when you don’t really want to get busy -- but your better half does, and you know he’s not going away anytime soon. (Remember Miranda’s “let’s just get it over with!” comment to Steve from Sex and the City? Not that you’d ever actually say that, but you can relate, right?) We asked sex and relationship experts how to get intimate without getting acrobatic. Lazy girls, take note!
Also see: 10 Mistakes Couples Make That Destroy Their Sex Lives
Mutual masturbation is the perfect lazy-sex choice: you’re both guaranteed to get off exactly how you want, and you can go on from there or call it a night. “Propose it to your partner by telling them it turns you on to watch him, just like he likes watching you,” says Lori Buckley, a relationship and sex therapist. Then get comfortable -- angle your bodies away so your hands are free and you’ve both got a good view (but feel free to rub legs or touch with your free hands to feel close to each other) or spread your legs in front of him and rest your head on a few pillows so you can enjoy watching his reactions.
Also see: Men Reveal Their Biggest Sexual Pet Peeves
Try This Position: The Lie & Lift
"Side by side is a great position -- you can just lie down next to each other and relax," says sex and relationship expert, Ian Kerner. In our favorite variation, lie flat on your back and lift up the leg nearest to him. He enters you from the side and slightly behind you, straddling your outstretched leg. You can lie back and relax, while he does all the work!
Also see: When to Have Sex with Your New Guy
Use a Mirror
We bet you have a mirror (or three) in your bedroom -- and if you’re the laziest one of all, lean it up on something so it reflects your bed, and let him get on top. Before he starts getting all revved up, direct his attention to your reflection. (We promise you won’t be scarred from seeing your not-quite perfect bodies in motion!) Why does this trick work? Because it’s one easy gimmick that will get your guy hot, bothered and ready for the main event more quickly.
Also see: 14 Signs You Might Be Bad In Bed
Make Out Like a Teenager
Remember how intense making out was before you started having sex? Well, you can still get that same adrenaline rush with your guy, without going further – just lay next to him and kiss him. "It’s teasing," says Buckley. "Which doesn’t require much energy and it’s really arousing, because of all the anticipation. People need more of that in their sex lives -- it’s a great opportunity to mix that in when you don’t feel like doing much else." Learn how to have an orgasmic (yes, we’re serious!) French kiss with these tips.
Also see: Kissing Revealed: 17 Things You Never Knew About Locking Lips
Watch Porn Together
What’s lazier than watching TV in bed? In fact, watching porn together is a lazy gal’s godsend when it comes to jumpstarting your sex drive, says Kerner. Websites like XTube.com, which asks you to state your gender and the gender of the people you want to watch, or Fleshbot.com, which regularly features written erotica as well as video, are perfect for porn newbies and aficionados alike. Even if watching porn together doesn’t get you in the mood this time -- although we’re guessing it will -- it might inspire you to try some porn-star moves …next time.
Take a Bath Together
Sure, showering together is fun -- but you’re too tired to stand up right now. The sexier (and lazier) solution: Take a bath. Soaping up each other’s naughty bits is just an excuse to gently massage the soap away under the hot water. "Focus on sensuality rather than sexuality," says Buckley. Turn the lights down low, and sit between his legs so you’re lying back on his body; it’s the perfect position for him to caress your stress away with a little massage oil.
Give Him a Happy Ending
A good old fashioned hand job is perfect for when you’re not quite in the mood but your man is raring to go -- and using a male masturbation sleeve makes it even easier on you! "The male masturbation sleeves means you’re kind of doing the work, but feels more like being inside a woman," says Buckley. Start off by giving him a hand job, and as you both get into the swing of things, you can either bring him to climax that way or have him finish inside of you. Just don’t forget the lube! Buckley recommends a natural, water-based lubricant that won’t irritate skin -- like Sliquid Organics.
Leave Your Clothes On
Channel your inner teenager and do a little sexy rubbing -- with your clothes on! "Rubbing without intercourse gives a lot of women orgasms even where intercourse doesn’t," says Buckley. For that, you’ll want him to roll on top of you so his erection can stimulate your clit -- "use his penis like a sex toy!" says Kerner. And more of a windup is always a good thing, says Michele Weiner, relationship expert and founder of Divorcebusters.com: "Making sex sexier for a lot of people has to do with longer and more intimate foreplay."
Go On, Have Comfort Sex
"There’s a real value to comfort sex," says Kerner. "Whatever scripts you normally engage in, you develop neural pathways that will make it easier to have orgasms if you go down that same route." So if you’ve been feeling more cuddly than circus performer, run with that: have him enter you from behind while he spoons you, so you can relax and enjoy the full-body contact.
Let Him Release -- On You!
Get the action started by simply telling him it turns you on to watch him come, and instruct him to masturbate while kneeling over you. A little lip-licking and moaning goes a long way if you’re not up for more naughty conversation, or you can put on a show by massaging your breasts -- and then instruct him to come onto them. He’ll feel totally attended to with all the visual, verbal and physical stimulation, without you ever lifting a finger.
Get Busy Wherever You Are
Okay, we’re not suggesting you engage in any public shenanigans, but you also don’t have to make a beeline to the bedroom every time you want to get busy. Weiner subscribes to the Nike philosophy: Just do it. So the next time your man starts groping you during a Real Housewives marathon, don’t wait to drag yourselves upstairs, go for it right where you are. After all, spontaneity is sexy -- and staying on the couch is easy!
Open the Toy Box
Vibrators aren’t just for girls, despite what Charlotte and her Rabbit might have you believe. Toys like the Jimmyjane Form 3, which is flexible like a tongue, is fun for both of you to use -- have him gently rub your clitoris with it, or use it to stroke and stimulate his balls while you go down on him. Otherwise, tell him you want to watch him please himself because you'll learn by watching, advises Buckley.
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