Little-Known Fact...
MASTERFILE
Little-Known Fact...
Having kids increases the occurrence of embarrassing moments exponentially. Just ask these moms!
A Wee Too Late
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A Wee Too Late
"It had been six months since my second baby was born and my oldest wanted to go bounce on my in-laws" trampoline while we were there visiting, so off we went. Apparently, the second pregnancy really did a number downtown and it took just a few jumps for everyone in viewing distance to see that. (Me wearing grey shorts sort of shone a spotlight on the lack of bladder control.) I did my best to lock my legs together and scurry inside to change, but the damage had been done.” - Bianca
The Better to Wrap You In, My Dear
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The Better to Wrap You In, My Dear
"Our neighbour is this sweet old granny who took it upon herself to knit our three-year-old a sweater for Christmas last year. We tried to prepare him to use his manners before going to her house to open the gift, but it was all for naught because once he ripped into it and saw it wasn"t a toy, he folded his arms, got a grumpy look on his face, and said he didn"t want it. I get that kids don"t know how to handle their emotions sometimes, but holy crap, I was so incredibly mortified in that moment.” - Lori
Freaking Out!
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Freaking Out!
"When my son was almost one, I accidentally locked him (and my purse and my phone and my keys) in the car outside the St. Lawrence Market. I had to beg a stranger to use their phone in order to wake up my husband, who by the grace of God, found the spare car keys to come and release our son. I was singing to my little boy at the top of my lungs on the street corner so he could hear me and stay calm (or maybe so I could stay calm) as he was strapped into his car seat.” - Donna
Umm...
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Umm...
"My four-year-old decided to tell a joke in front of an audience of kids. When he got to the punch line of his, ‘Why did the chicken cross the road" bit, he yelled out, ‘Because he had no legs," and threw himself on the floor and writhed about. The fact that the joke made no sense was lost as soon as he hit the floor and as overjoyed as he was with his performance, I was making any and every attempt possible to hide unwanted attention sent my way. Of course, he thwarted my efforts by running over to give me a hug after the show and asked if I thought he did a good job. What is a mother to say?! I love him.” - Dana
Unexpected Hiccup
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Unexpected Hiccup
"I was going to a party to meet extended members of my husband"s family and felt the need to impress. I thought I"d be smart and breastfeed my infant in the car before going inside, but realized on the way in that my plan went horribly wrong when my I felt my son"s burp spreading all over my outfit. I looked down and sure enough there was barely a dry spot on me. Nothing like meeting new people with a wet shirt and eau de regurgitated breast milk lingering.” - Christiane
Surprise Treat
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Surprise Treat
"We were hosting some new, couple friends from church when my oldest son came running downstairs, giddy with laughter. I was in the living room and couldn"t see what he"d found, but heard him explaining to everyone that it was a treat and he was going to ask me if he could have some. I heard laughs following him and when my three-year-old finally made it to me, saw that his ‘treat" was a tampon still in its wrapper. The excitement in his eyes almost made the embarrassment less devastating. Almost.” - Sarah
No Use Crying Over Spilt Milk
MASTERFILE
No Use Crying Over Spilt Milk
"The first time I left my daughter at home for any length of time after she was born was for a co-worker"s wedding. I was so new at motherhood and nursing that I had never pumped, nor expressed my milk in any way. So, halfway through dinner, my chest was tight and tingling and my suit was soaked, but I didn"t clue into the fact that I could just go in to the bathroom to take care of the problem. I didn"t know if anyone could see my liquid issue, but I felt like such a fool. So I went home.” - Dana
Seeing Double
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Seeing Double
"I loved reading Robert Munsch books as a kid and have forced them upon my two-year-old daughter as a result. My in-laws were over one afternoon and we just finished reading The Paper Bag Princess when my daughter flipped the book over and noticed the picture of Munsch and Michael Martchenko on the back. My daughter proceeded to point at Robert Munsch and say, ‘Papa," and we all smiled since my father-in-law does look like him. My daughter then went on to point to Martchenko and dub him ‘Nana," who, with his short hair, could bare a slight resemblance. Based on my mother-in-law"s face, things went from amusing to not at all funny in two seconds flat.” - Fran
Padded Protection
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Padded Protection
"I was breastfeeding on the couch and must have forgotten a breast pad on the cushion when I got up. Sure enough, my dad sat down and was then seen walking around the house with a nice white breast pad stuck to his pants. I had to ask my mom to try and discreetly get it off. It's not exactly the most comfortable thing to ask your father if you can have your breast pad back." - Jill
Temper Tantrum
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Temper Tantrum
"Ugh, any visit to the grocery store is an embarrassing moment. It"s like there"s some sign that"s only visible to children that encourages them to bust out their best tantrums. My son has thrown himself on the floor, knocked boxes off of shelves, wailed at the top of his lungs and even hit some unsuspecting old lady who happened to need a bottle of syrup while he was melting down. I want the earth to open up and swallow me whole in these moments." - Olivia
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